Relational Life Therapy (RLT by Terry Real) in Aventura, Florida and Remote!
What is Relational Life Therapy?
Relational Life Therapy is a couples therapy developed by Terry Real and outlined in Terry Real’s book “The New Rules for Marriage” and “Us.” In RLT the therapist addresses the core issues head on and takes a more active stance in the healing work.
What are the Phases of RLT?
RLT is divided into three phases. They are identifying the issues, doing trauma work, and skills building:
Identifying the issues challenges - The RLT therapist will speak with and observe the couple to see what are the hidden dynamics at play. Many times the reactions we are having are shadows from our past wounds in childhood. A skilled RLT therapist will identify each partners unique patterns and unveil the hidden dynamic.
Trauma work- In this middle phase of RLT, the therapist will work with each partners adaptive-teenage projector parts and the younger-child parts in the room with the spouse. In this healing container, the spouses can witness each other connect the dots and process past pain. Being able to aid as a witnessing presence and safe space, the spouses can do this healing work together with the safety of a skilled RLT couples therapist.
Skill building- Once the deeper patterns have been recognized and processed, we are ready for integration. In this phase we bring down the core skills needed to be able to adapt to the real life challenges life throws at us. Whether it is learning to take healthy responsibility, use relational mindfulness, and the many other skills needed for the unique couple.
How is RLT Different from Regular Couples Therapy?
Couples who do this work find that it goes deeper than standard couples therapy. Some differences we see in RLT couples therapy:
RLT is not afraid to challenge grandiose/narcissistic or challenging partners. We take sides when the power imbalance is off
RLT focuses also on underlying dynamics in the subconscious, not just behavioral patterns and skills.
RLT work acknowledge the many parts inside of us that can even be contradictory or unclear at times.
RLT emphasizes the role of trauma, c-ptsd, and relational wounds caused before and during the relationship.
We are not stuck on one or two simple lenses. We understand people are complex and unique and focus on using our knowledge to fit the specific circumstance, not rigid in a modality.
How do I begin?
In summary, people find Relational Life Therapy work to be the deep, honest, direct couples therapy work they are seeking. In our therapy practice, all of our therapists are trained in RLT by Terry Real. Feel free to schedule a free consultation with one of our therapists and begin today!